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Emergence from Convergence

October 16, 2014

No87My work space through a wide angled lens

Finally I’m back where I need to be, my equestrian sculpture is thriving and my drawings and prints are going pretty well too. But most importantly I’ve uncovered a deeper meaning to my art which is invaluable, I have a powerful direction and a determination to explore my possibilities to far greater depths. At the moment I’m poised to develop my exploratory work with sculpted female figures and I’m really very excited by this prospect. I have so much work to do to broaden my aesthetic limitations and realise possibilities that are not even within my current grasp. Hopefully the outcome will contain elements of surprise and I would imagine that even I will be unable to decipher or explain their appearance. In this sense art is so exciting because the fluency and organic nature of evolving concepts doesn’t require an explanation, because the realisation of a conceived idea actually exists.  Visual Art really doesn’t require a commentary or an explanation unless you feel insecure about your ability to communicate visually, or you want to impose grandiose claims. My own attitude is a modest one, I’m an ordinary man and I have a singular perspective that comes from my own limited experience of being, this is what I explore through my art. My concepts are not of cosmic importance, but they are an honest expression, sincere and respectful. Respectful to those who may experience my work, respectful to the human endeavour of art and respectful to myself and my upbringing. I have always believed in honour and transparency, two things which have caused me great trouble within the art world and which have led to great disappointment and sadness. Though finally all my experiences led me to finding something very special,  a positive outcome and a strength of resolve that feels like granite. Because when you fight for your right to be you and realise your dreams the hard way, there is a level of satisfaction that is very special. Now as I reach new heights with my work I know deep inside that I have already achieved a great deal regardless of the fact that my work is largely ignored. When I walk into my studio and see all that work and feel all the new possibilities within, I can’t help but smile to myself, I just seem to thrive on adversity and living a life of doing it my way.

blue hat

Through my sculpture I make statements that offer substance to concepts, and through my drawing I look for the possibility of substance to validate both my though process and my intuitive expression. It has become a symbiotic relationship dependent on  a delicate co-relationship in which each aspect complements and feeds each discipline. The sculptures validate the drawings through solid matter and become a stepping stone upon which you can expand your horizons and the sculptures in themselves offer a suggestion of future possibilities. My solitary path at the moment is very complex and has become a singular expression of an artist abandoned by society in all but my accomplished equestrian offerings. It is a problem because my project based work, drawings and prints are at the forefront of my artistry yet they remain in total obscurity and my determination to break through into a more sophisticated level of artistic expression is dependent on a great sacrifice in my standard of living. This world is cruel to artists and the sense of despair is real and present as you become abandoned to your fate, support dwindles from those around you because the wider perception of your work influences people. If you are successful in the eyes of the world people want a bit of the action, conversely if people are confused by your work and it is generally ignored, people find it hard to commit to the unknown. But my problem is that I know I have some significant ideas and yet there is nothing that I can do to get them out there. My solution is to manufacture them on a small-scale, but the wolf is at my door and finding the time and energy is taking a super human effort. That sheer level of commitment is not easy and is taking a heavy toll on me physically and leading to a deep frustration and at the moment I really can’t see an end to my farcical struggle.

Happy2

A struggle defined by the difference between making art as a commodity for a market, art that ostensibly is made to please and attract buyers, which is market led, and art made as an open expression. Art as an open expression is made regardless of reaction and commercial viability, the humble truth of what an individual artist has to offer. But this infernal market economy destroys true art and turns it into a fashion show of commodity, simplistic concepts exploited for the convenience of a market. As an artist I understand the value of my artistic possibility and yet I’m forced into a struggle to find a legitimate way of expressing it and after thirty years of struggle I’m pissed off in a pretty big way. Enforced compromise and years of wing clipping have taken a heavy toll on my tolerance level and anger is never far from my grasp, the controlling grip that society has on a free spirit like me is utterly intolerable at times as my life is compromised by utter poverty. Sometimes I just wish that I could conclude my artistic quest and walk away from art all together, but I simply can’t, because without art I can see no great meaning to my life. I don’t know why or how but time and again I turn my frustrations into a positive drive forward with my work and it fuels my determination to prove my worth as an artist, on all the disciplines that I choose to define my expression. Though today anger is my companion as I try to muster the energy to fight on with my trying circumstances. The horrible truth is that I could choose to use my art to generate wealth but it would not be true art and I could not countenance the selling of my soul because the diminution of my integrity is non negotiable.

Angel1

You know people often turn the tables on me and accuse me of being fully culpable for my predicament, citing the economic possibilities and all the opportunities for art, as though there is a quick fix, but this is deeply patronising and naive. I have always sponsored my own art, I’ve never had a grant or any financial assistance or any intervention or help from institutions, so I speak with an authentic voice of an artist who has lived a life in ordinary society, an authentic artist keeping it real. And the stark reality is that if people don’t stand up and question the status quo we would live increasingly bland lives, you can’t put a price on creativity and we have a right to explore our possibilities even if the price is perceived as a failure. As an artist you question everything and it can tear you apart, there is no safe ground as you follow your intuition whole heartedly, committed to a life long cause. Nobody owns you, because you’re unpredictable and there is a risk factor because inside we don’t know what ideas will form in the untold future, a life of adventure and a life without certainty. For so many years I allowed the art world to ride rough shod over my life, I tried to protect myself by allowing it to go straight over my head, but in the end it got to me and I feel this experience is a valuable lesson. Sharing my thoughts and reflections candidly is my duty as an artist and I can only hope that it may touch something within others and add an opinion to the great mix.

No88

Bye for now beautiful people xxx

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