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I don’t know much about Art, but I know what I hate.

November 12, 2014

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At the moment I feel like I’ve climbed a mountain with my art and as I look down I feel that I can understand the terrain that I’ve traversed, however when I look in front of me I’m aware that I’m still in the foothills and that the real challenges lay ahead. But for now I have some new skills and a much deeper understanding which I need in order to develop further, because I have finally understood that life is an ongoing challenge. There is no simple solution or static point where you suddenly arrive at, to wallow in triumph, because art is not about fixed absolutes, but instead marks made in time and of the moment. In  my own life I’ve been guilty of dealing in absolutes and I blame this on a personal misunderstanding of what sculpture actually is, as I searched for fixed concepts. Through time my approach to sculpture and my ongoing search through the rotation of objects led me to make many discoveries and demonstrated that there was an alternative approach to composition and the conceptualizing process.  And that I could in fact free to invent my own personal approach on every level, my own theory and practice governing every aspect of my creativity. I find it’s a slow process to gradually broaden my aesthetic understanding and breadth and one that I must do empirically through taking risks and playing with what may often appear to be ridiculous notions.  I find my playing around and fun time to be significantly beneficial, though I’ve been a little serious of late as I tried to make strides to understand myself on a deeper level and I’ve missed it.

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From my current position I see my whole lifes journey as a confluence of disparate elements that have become woven together to define an approach that is deeply personal and it is only through the an intense and concentrated period of study that has allowed me to bring these strands together. The strange thing is that when you analyse circumstance, reaction and gesture your life kind of makes sense because it defines just who you are and why all your actions and reactions have a significance th the whole. So while my past defines who I am at this moment in time  it doesn’t necessarily hold me in bondage and dictate my future, though it does empower me to make choices. So what choices should I make? and why? are amongst the big questions to which I feel there are no definitive answers. And because I can find no definitive answers my choice veers towards an organic evolution through my work and with each piece I make there is always a question and a movement in a direction. So much so that I almost have a blind faith and belief in the intuition and unknown factors that guide me through my work, the statements and reflections of a process in a constant state of flux. It is an utterly fascinating life and the byproduct (art) excites me too.

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Today I was driving my car (with due diligence)  and lost in thought, thoughts about life that warmed me deep inside and made me feel connected to the beauty of being. I was thinking about freedom and feeling truly free to explore the whole possibility of being, through art. I thought about love, hate and indifference, and even contemplated the invisible line between beauty and ugliness amongst an explosion of thoughts about sensory perceptions. It made me feel lucky that I have the time and reason to explore the simple act of being to a point where I appreciate my mortality on a very basic level. A place where I just enjoy being myself on my own, because I feel comfortable with my own realisation through how I approach my life and choose to live. In a life without a belief in absolutes I feel that I have found an interesting path that allows me to enjoy my existence through the great challenges that making art brings, particularly now that I have found the strength to be more independent. Whilst I’m more determined than ever to make interesting and original art, it is only in the pursuit of the contentment for a life truly lived and experienced for the timeless value of being. Just to know that life is for living freely and celebrating through connection and experiencing as opposed to suffering and bondage in search of the hollow dreams. I think I know what satisfies my soul now.

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❤ ❤ ❤

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