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The Impossibility of Everything

April 15, 2019

I recall a conversation I had with a friend whilst driving in the south of England a few years ago in which he said this moment is like an impossibility. Sitting here together driving, talking and taking life for granted within the context of space, time and infinite possibility. An ordinary actuality that depended on everything ever happening before (the way it did), a moment just part of the ongoing moments which in turn impact the future. We both felt that the possibility of circumstance is almost impossible as a mathematical probability, yet an inevitability of existence. Every moment of life a special and precious gift, bound in this contradiction of magic and inevitability.

As a human being it’s possible to take ones predicament for granted, yet our individual existence is manifest from a trillions to one probability, which I believe makes each and every life miraculous and special. Every moment in our existence special just because it occurred against the odds of it ever occurring. This complex construction of a living breathing entity with a beating heart is a complete mystery and yet more often than not we take this for granted and live lives bound and influenced by the social pressures imposed by society.

This beautiful magic of existential life is so amazing that I believe it deserves exploration in the purest of ways. Or at least a pause and a moment of recognition and reflection to realise what actually occurs to allow us to experience the present, the right here and the right now. As in a life stripped bare to the point of confronting existence and the search for a true connection to source. This is where I feel that art has a major role to play in society, because it is where we humans can express ourselves without formal language or concepts. We can just make marks as intuitive gestures, expressions from the soul and from whatever connects us to existence. Expression as an open gesture without the imposition of order, logic or rational interference. expression which allows us to see within and beyond conscious imposition.

As an artist I want to feel my connection, which is why I feel compelled to rebel against the taming of the spirit. And also to rebel against the order of society which tries to separate me from the truth of my existence and the importance of being. My hope is that by following a desperate desire for understanding, it will allow me to further understand existence through the singularity of a connected soul, going beyond the distraction of society. To just glimpse as far as my sensory perception will allow and then a little bit more so that I may understand beyond the obvious and feel what it is to be.

Sometimes I look at computer generated images of the solar vortex we inhabit, followed by images of our galaxy and then finally of the cosmic web and I do this in the hope of understanding the circumstance of our existence. Then I think about the limitation of human sensory perception and wonder how it could be possible to understand the complexity of everything with such a simple way of seeing. It does make me profoundly aware of my limitations and how closed my mind is to the possibilities beyond what I think I know. Then I wonder about Dr Seuss and his book “Horton Hears a Who” and I wonder if our world is a microscopic part of something so big that we are incapable of seeing it.

I must admit that seeing the truth of the world as a microscopic part of something bigger helps me to cope with the concept of infinity. And it does this because it allows me to think on a different scale that goes beyond the logic of human perception. Simply because what I take as absolute, may just be entirely wrong and that what I need to be able to see or understand is something so unexpected that I must not take anything for granted.

In this context of time and space my knowledge really amounts to zero but within me as within all of us there is an absolute connection to the source of life and existence. So what if the truth is in there as an intuitive knowledge that we are born with. Accessible through the expressions and marks we make as beings, a possibility which would make art fundamentally important to civilization.

What we are dealing with as conscious organic life forms is massive, huge concepts and notions, becoming ever more complicated as assumed knowledge increases. Perhaps it’s down to the inherent infinity which may exist in every aspect of being, to the point where we really can’t grasp on to anything with certainty. Something which society in its generalisation and dumbing down of existence doesn’t help with. But I also realise that in my thinking I’m imposing my limited perceptions on a vastness which can’t be harnessed by the workings of my mind.

But whatever the answers are to these huge questions, we can look at our own lives within our circumstance and really comprehend the “impossibility of everything” in what at times may seem a mundane and ordinary life. At least then we can appreciate the amazing beauty of existence, the waking up on a morning to yet another special day in the company of fellow strangers. Living together in so-called civilization without really understanding our predicament of what we are, how we got here and whether or not there is a purpose.

In the making of art, or even contemplating the making of art, one is forced to think about the meaning of life. Of course there is no singular answer,  though just maybe there is a feeling that something feels right for the moment. However we evolve and develop and ask further questions, sometimes we get it right and sometimes we fail, and we learn and move on. But as with all human pursuits there is no right or wrong, good or bad within the realms of human expression, that is untill we apply judgements.  Judgements which often become shared and established as part of societal sensibility and imposed as values.

So you forget the judgements and do what you do, if it feels right you’re heading in the right direction. If it don’t feel right then you keep on looking and trying till you find your way.

Have a beautiful day and thanks for looking 🙂



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